


Believe

by Purplechimera



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, First War with Voldemort, M/M, Song fic, Time Skips, canon compliant character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-15
Updated: 2019-03-15
Packaged: 2019-11-18 12:05:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18120488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purplechimera/pseuds/Purplechimera
Summary: Do you believe in life after love?A Cher songfic





	Believe

_No matter how hard I try_  
_You keep pushing me aside_  
_And I can't break through_

____

\---June 1981

“Whatever, Sirius. I quit.” Remus strode across the flat, shoving himself roughly into his worn coat.

Sirius catapulted from the couch and attempted to block the door. “Wait, Remus-”

Remus’ voice and eyes went cold. “Move.”

After only a moment of hesitation, Sirius retreated down the hall. The echo of the door traveled all the way into the bedroom.

\---

_There's no talking to you_  
_It's so sad that you're leaving_  
_It takes time to believe it_

____

\---June 1981

The fifth owl in as many days tapped on window, and Sirius didn’t even look up as he waved his hand to retrieve another unopened letter. His hand collapsed onto the back of the couch, and the letter fell onto the floor. Sirius rolled over, and even though he was starting to smell how long it had been since he’d showered, he couldn’t muster up the energy to care.

James tumbled out of the Floo, immediately locating Sirius sprawled on the couch. 

“Oi! Pads!” He poked Sirius’ shoulder, and one grey eye cracked open.

“Hullo, James.”

James raised an eyebrow and hauled Sirius off the couch. “Alright, you. Come on. You’re coming home with me.” 

Sirius didn’t protest. He allowed James to man handle him through the Floo, across the living room in Godric’s Hollow, and into the shower.

\---

_But after all is said and done_  
_You're gonna be the lonely one_

\---August 1981

Lily stepped out of the Floo, her face ashen. James is immediately on his feet, wrapping her in his arms. Lily buried her face in his shoulder, her voice muffled by his shirt and her own tears.

“Not, Harry, James. Please, not Harry…”

“Shh, love. We’ll figure something out.” His fingers rubbed across her back.

Sirius stared at his knees from his perch on the couch. In the weeks since Remus had left, Sirius had slowly become most of a human again. He'd even been able to provide the Order with insights into the Death Eaters, based on his childhood memories.

Now though, he was wrecking his brain, trying to come up with a solution to the death sentence that had just been pronounced on his godson. He was still thinking when Dumbledore stepped out of the Floo.

“James, Lily. I'm glad you're both home. We have much to discuss.” 

Sirius made his way into Harry's room, peering down at the sleeping toddler. He turned into Padfoot and crawled underneath the crib.

By morning, Sirius had convinced James to use Peter as Secret Keeper. 

\---

_Do you believe in life after love_  
_I can feel something inside me say_  
_I really don't think you're strong enough_  
_Do you believe in life after love_  
_I can feel something inside me say_  
_I really don't think you're strong enough_

_____ _

\---April 1978

As Remus strode down the third floor corridor, the one-eyed witch statue opened and long fingers darted out, grabbing him by the back of his robes.

Before he could protest, Sirius was pressing against him, mouth covering Remus’ as his hands roamed under Remus’ robes. They pulled apart some time later, and it took several minutes for Remus to pull his clothes back in order. Sirius continued pressing open-mouthed kisses along Remus’ neck. 

“Pads, I've got to go.”

Sirius made a noise of protest as he reached the hollow at the base of Remus’ throat. Remus chuckled, but gently pushed Sirius away.

“Alright, love. One more class. Then I'm yours.” He pressed a kiss against Sirius’ temple and hurried out of the passage.

\---

_What am I supposed to do_  
_Sit around and wait for you_

\---November 1981

Remus peered around the building. He watched in horrified silence as Peter and Sirius yelled at each other. He watched Sirius laugh-not the warm, rolling laughter as they had tumbled in bed, but cold, almost manic. He turned away as the Aurors arrived, melting back into the crowd of Muggle onlookers.

His cave was even colder than usual.

\---

_Well I can't do that_  
_And there's no turning back_

\---Halloween 1986

The wind cut through Remus’ threadbare coat as he created the hill and looked down at Godric’s Hollow. Even from this distance, he could see the damaged Potter home, stark against the evening light. He watched a trail of people delivering candles to Lily and James’ grave stones. By the time Remus turned away, the line of candles wrapped all the way through town.

\---

_I need time to move on_  
_I need a love to feel strong_  
_Cause I've got time to think it through_  
_And maybe I'm too good for you_

_____ _

\---June 1993

__

Remus felt the pull of the moon before it had even fully risen. It tugged at his bones, made him fight the urge to claw at his own skin. His last thought before he surrendered to the wolf was the anguish of both desperately wanting to nuzzle Padfoot, and also tear out his throat.

__

When he woke the next morning, his customary injury check was interrupted by the soft hooting of an owl. The wolf was still close enough that he had to fight the instinct to attack it.

__

Dear Mr. Lupin,  
I hope this letter finds you in good health. I am writing to you because I am on a quest to fill the role of Defence Against The Dark Arts professor at Hogwarts, and I am quite hopeful that you would be available to fill the role. If you are amenable, please let me know by return of owl, and I will see you at Hogwarts on September 1st!  
Albus Dumbledore

__

\---

__

_Do you believe in life after love_  
_I can feel something inside me say_  
_I really don't think you're strong enough_  
_Do you believe in life after love_  
_I can feel something inside me say_  
_I really don't think you're strong enough_

__

______ _ _

\---August 1993

______ _ _

Remus waited until the very last minute to pack. He knew he didn’t really have another choice, but it still hurt to dig out the briefcase James, Sirius and Peter had given him for his seventeenth birthday.

______ _ _

Padfoot stared up at the swollen moon, and it was all he could do not to turn back into Sirius to add another line to the wall of his cell. Instead, he turned into the woods and began hunting rodents.

______ _ _

\---

______ _ _

_Well I know that I'll get through this_

______ _ _

\---

______ _ _

The cold jerked Remus awake, and for a moment, he was staring across the train compartment at James. 

______ _ _

As his own eyes focused, he realized that the eyes of the boy sitting across from him were green, and under his wild hair was a lightning-bolt shaped scar.

______ _ _

Harry.

______ _ _

Remus turned toward the Dementor in the doorway, and rose.

______ _ _

“None of us are hiding Sirius Black under our cloaks.”

______ _ _

\---

______ _ _

_'Cause I know that I am strong_

______ _ _

\---September 1993

______ _ _

Perhaps Remus was having too much fun playing at being a professor. Still, he couldn’t resist pranking Peeves now that he finally had the opportunity without the threat of detention. And so what if it happened to be in front of the class with Harry in it?

______ _ _

He was so pleased with his own cleverness that, without thinking, he stepped in front of the Boggart. It wasn’t until it turned into the full moon that Remus had realized what he’d done. Still, he was an expert in remaining calm under pressure, and he waved his wand as lazily as he could manage.

______ _ _

“Riddikulus!”

______ _ _

\---

______ _ _

_I don't need you anymore_

______ _ _

\---October 1993

______ _ _

“Thank you, Severus.” Remus shifted a stack of parchments to make room for his daily goblet of Wolfsbane potion.

______ _ _

\---

______ _ _

_I don't need you anymore_

______ _ _

\---November 1993

______ _ _

Moony curled up in the overstuffed armchair by the fire, delighted to be inside where it was warm and dry, rather than out in the Shrieking Shack where the wind pierced like needles.

______ _ _

\---

______ _ _

_I don't need you anymore_  
_No, I don’t need you anymore_

_______ _ _ _

\---May 1994

_______ _ _ _

“The Map doesn’t lie,” Remus murmured as he watched Sirius drag Ron and Peter under the Whomping Willow and into the Shack. Remus broke into a run as he crossed the grounds.

_______ _ _ _

\---

_______ _ _ _

_Do you believe in life after love_

_______ _ _ _

\---June 1995

_______ _ _ _

Sirius leaned against the door, praying Remus would give him another chance. He knocked again.

_______ _ _ _

“Moony?”

_______ _ _ _

The door creaked open. Remus stood in his pajamas, a mug of tea in one hand. Before Sirius could say anything, he was hauled inside by his collar and shoved against the wall, the shattering of Remus’ mug a distant ringing as he was surrounded by the smell of Remus and the never-quite-forgotten feel of their lips pressing together.

_______ _ _ _

\---

_______ _ _ _

_I can feel something inside me say_  
_I really don't think you're strong enough_

________ _ _ _ _

\---June 1996

________ _ _ _ _

On instinct, Remus grabbed Harry, even though his insides were screaming to follow Sirius through the veil.

________ _ _ _ _

“He’s gone, Harry. He’s gone.”

________ _ _ _ _


End file.
